INSIDE HOCKEY

Well, thanks a lot, San Jose Sharks, for disappointing me again. I give up on you. Good thing my team, the Ducks, have been doing so well (for the most part). I fought five o’clock traffic to get down to Anaheim for their fourth game against the Detroit Red Wings in the Western Conference semifinals. Unfortunately, they lost 6-3 putting the series at an even 2-2. I hope it wasn’t my fault, as I didn’t realize, until I got to the Honda Center close to game time, that I had made a fatal error. I accidentally wore a red sweater to the game. How embarrassing! It was probably a bad luck charm, too. For this, I must apologize, Ducks. I’m sorry.

Now let’s get to the game. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY RED WINGS FANS IN ANAHEIM? I understand when there are a few random enemy fans at a home arena, but come on! I would definitely go to the Staples Center and cheer for the Avalanche, but I would probably only be accompanied by four people in the entire arena. But at the Honda Center in Round Two of the playoffs, I think there were more cheers than boos when Detroit scored. Frankly, the blood red overtaking the sea of orange scared me. I know Detroit is “hockeytown” but c’mon, you’re in the sunshine so put on some orange.

Aside from the scary red, the game started off really exciting when Corey Perry scored a goal at 42 seconds of the first period. The crowd was clearly mixed on its opinion of the goal. Next to me there was a father swinging his orange towel in the face of his Detroit fan kids. I wondered if they were just Wings fans to rebel against their father? I know if I had Detroit fan children it would surely irritate me. I might not swing a towel in front of their faces, but I would probably force them to stay home.

I also saw a group of orange t-shirted teens shouting and duck calling to a guy in a Shanahan jersey yelling back at them. The crowd definitely didn’t lack passion. I thought I might see a brawl off-ice in the Honda Center.

During the first intermission I meandered through the crowd to see if there were any fancy dressed Ducks fans. Nothing. I was disappointed in the lack of face paint and crazy attire but I made good use of my time by walking around eating a huge hot fudge sundae. The mammoth-sized bowl of ice cream seemed to impress everyone. I got a lot of comments on it like, “Hey, what are you eating?” or “Where did you get that?” or “That looks good!” After a while, my sundae gave me a sense of pride, even as my Ducks started to look lethargic in the second period.

My boastfulness wore off soon after I ate most of my huge treat. I spent the remainder of the game feeling sick. I’m not sure if it was the insane amount of sugar I ate or the scary amount of Wings fans in the crowd, but the third period, for me, was not good. Let’s just say, my stomach was churning when I looked at the clock and at 17:30 Detroit had 32 shots on goal and Anaheim had 23. Shortly after that, Detroit scored. In the midst of all the cheering I realized I had a can of root beer with my dinner and gummy bears as a snack earlier today. My body was probably going into shock, unsure how to process the sugar and Detroit overdose all at once.

Maybe we should discuss happier things, like how I love playoff time because that means playoff beards. I was a little saddened to not see the fabulous George Parros mustache, but I did OK with its absence. That is because Scott Neidermayer, the man with one of the best beards, hands down, scored an Anaheim power-play goal at 10:03 in the third period.

Funny, the one thing the crowd could agree on was a fight. There is nothing like a good punch-fest to bring red and orange together. Francois Beauchemin really wrecked Tomas Kopecky. After that, red and orange fans even agreed on when to leave the arena - pretty much when the Wings slammed the final nail in the coffin. Henrik Zetterberg stiffly swung his hammer down and ended it all with the sixth red goal of the night. I swear at this point most of the arena was cheering but I was unsure. It’s all kind of a blur in my sugar coma soaked brain.

All I know is that I am now going to be cautious when walking into the Honda Center. And next time, I am definitely not wearing a red sweater, no matter what team the Ducks are playing.