JD: So after two months of playoff hockey Dave Carty, we've whittled our field of 16 down to just two. The Red Wings, winners of the Presidents Trophy and the Penguins, winners of the Sidney Crosby sweepstakes, will meet for Lord Stanley's Cup. Let's just hope this series will make up for the last two rounds of uninspiring hockey.

DC: Well, the Stars gave it a run, right? Kind of? Oh well, I tried, but wasn't quite a genius in picking them to win the West.

But isn't that the point of the playoffs anyway - to weed out the weaker teams? These Stanley Cup final features, without question or hesitation, the best two teams in hockey. They skated through the playoffs on blades of dominance and cast aside the competition like so many strewn aside octopi. It's called utter dominance, Watson, and now the two best in the game meet for the only prize fit for a true king, Wing, or hockey prince.

JD: Well, I have my problems with it. First, a Canadian club didn't tease us with a passion-fueled playoff run. No "Oh Canada." No "C of Red" in Calgary. No unified Canadian front by fans of the six clubs north of the border to keep Stanley off U.S. soil. Secondly, I am sick and tired of Detroit labeling itself 'Hockeytown' as Joe Louis Arena struggles to sell-out games in April and May. And third and perhaps most importantly, if Sidney Crosby wants to be taken serious as a big-time athlete, he needs some big-time arm candy. I'd suggest Miley Cyrus.

DC: I agree, I'd like to see some Canadian blood in this chase, but you have to earn your way there. Toronto was dismal. Edmonton and Vancouver both missed the playoffs. Calgary and Montreal were exploited for their weaknesses and the Ottawa Senators may have been the living embodiment of the Hindenburg. Now that I've bemoaned an entire county, I will say it's pretty amazing to see how "Hockeytown" as devolved into the hockey version of the Atlanta Braves fan base. I guess they're equally as frustrated with recent post-season futility. Here's a team that has set the gold standard for how to draft and develop young talent from the ground up. Now, if only they could do the same for their fan base.

And Jake, enough with the Miley-Sidney campaign! It should be equally as illegal to play matchmaker with a 15-year old, as it is to be romantically involved with one.

JD: Oh Dave, Crosby isn’t even legally old enough to drink champagne from Lord Stanley if the Pens win this series. So what's your point exactly? And if Mike Comrie is good enough for Lizzie McGuire (a.k.a. Hilary Duff), Sid the Kid and Hannah Montana would be a perfect match. Just imagine the publicity. TMZ and Perez Hilton covering the Stanley Cup Final on a regular basis would be a nice shot in the arm for a sport desperately in need of one at times.

That being said, in Detroit, as the old saying goes, “It’s the economy, stupid." I don’t blame fans who don’t want to pony up hundreds of dollars for a Game 2 of the Western Conference Quarterfinals. But if you can’t back up “Hockeytown" with loud crowds and packed buildings, it might be time to give it up.

Plus, it could be argued that Detroit, if all were even, is actually a Tigers town.

But back to Crosby, because I would argue that most of us have the same love and affection for him that we have for Tom Brady. We would love to be him and women would love to be with him. Well, Tom Brady’s personal life is everywhere. His love life is everywhere. We debate which baseball cap he wears out on the town. There actually is a market for this stuff and the NHL hasn’t exploited it yet. They’re slowly rolling out those pink jerseys, but they could do so much more.

DC: If anybody - ANYBODY - in the offices of TMZ or can name for me a single line pairing from either team, I'd credential them. But, in the end, their sorry act is about as useful in this venue as a clean-shaven face. The story of the post-season so far lies in between the pipes. Look no further than our two Stanley Cup teams for proof. The Dominator found his way to the bench and Chris Osgood has stepped in to near-perfection. Pittsburgh would be nowhere without its phenomenal former #1 pick - of course; I'm talking about Marc-Andre Fleury. The guy went from a liability to defining reliability. He leads all goalies in post-season save percentage (.938) and shutouts (3). Everyone talks about Sid the Kid but the Cup will be decided by Fleury's play. That's the difference a good (or maybe just a hot) goaltender can make in the playoffs.

JD: I must say, I didn’t think the kid had it in him. He has just been sensational, making big save after big save. I am thrilled for him and just hope the other shoe doesn’t drop for him as we hit Round Four.

As for my pick for the story of this year’s playoffs so far, I'll go with you, Sean Avery. You do whatever it takes to win. You got hurt in the line of duty. And your personal life is exactly what this league needs. It wasn't that Elisha Cuthbert was spotted with Dion Phaneuf that got to me, but this rumor about her hitting on Pete Wentz (a.k.a.) Mr. Ashlee Simpson, who might be the exact opposite of what one would consider a hockey player.

DC: I'll agree with you there. Can you imagine if Niklas Kronwall got a good open ice hit on him? He'd come apart at the seams then write a depressingly stylish song about it. What are you suggesting happened to Avery this post-season? A Tony Romo-Jessica Simpson type effect?

JD: Right. So, as a pop connoisseur that still can't find Versus on my cable, Sean Avery was the biggest story of the playoffs. Except this reminds me of that episode of Just Shoot Me where Dennis Finch picked Rebecca Romijn off the rebound from a goon hockey player. Something just isn't right here.

As for Tony and Jessica, I don’t see it. Remember, tough guys get the girls short-term, but they always fall for the less attractive men in the long run. We’re better providers, well, except for that financial detail.

DC: Ok, when you start talking about "Just Shoot Me," you know this discussion has gotten horribly untrendy, unfunny, and way off track. Can we talk about some hockey before my brain explodes?

JD: I predict that Chris Osgood won't try and butt somebody with the top of his stick again like he did to Mike Ribero. Though in the eyes of 29 other teams, he couldn't have picked a better target. I also predict that ESPN will cover more of the U.S. Women's Softball Team's barnstorming tour than the Stanley Cup Final. And finally, I like the Red Wings in six, because this series reminds me of the 1995 NBA Finals, with the Pens, like the Magic, a young team with the league's second coming and a nice supporting cast. The Red Wings, like the Rockets, a battle tested and experienced bunch. They also have home ice advantage and two goalies with Stanley Cup rings.

DC: This series is so hard to predict because of the one-sidedness each team has displayed against their opponents thus far. When the Marian Hossa trade went down, everybody saw it as a huge gamble. I found myself on the fence after the trade, but acknowledged that the trade gave the Pens the league's best power play. Unfortunately with injuries it took them awhile to all get acclimated to each other. The superiority they've shown this post-season is no fluke. I'll take the Pens in 7 games in the best Stanley Cup series we've seen since the lockout.

JD: For the record, we were texting each other as the Hossa trade went down. You thought they gave up too much, I thought they had to go for broke with all of the young talent they had at cheap dollars. The way the league is set up, the idea of the Penguins establishing themselves as a dynasty isn’t going to happen. There is no way to have Crosby, Fleury and Malkin and build a significant supporting cast under a salary cap. Any salary cap...

DC: We’ll see what happens. I do think “The Marian Hossa Sweepstakes – Part Deux” will be one of the better sequels of the summer.

JD: So there you have it, all of the hockey analysis that you won't get elsewhere. I'm sure we'll be back at some point in this series to break down Don Cherry's suits. Though we might leave that one up to Perez Hilton.

DC: You should ask him what to wear out on job interviews.

JD: It couldn’t hurt, right?